The Psychology of Officiating - Part 3: Resilience
Finding strength in the struggles
The Strength to Recover
In every referee's journey, resilience isn’t just an asset, it’s a necessity. Because mistakes are inevitable; they’re practically written into the job description. An incorrect call. A moment of hesitation. The sting of a coach’s glare or the roar of disapproval from the stands. Moments like these are universal—every official, no matter how experienced, has felt the weight of a whistle that didn’t land quite right.
Resilience, though, isn’t about avoiding or ignoring mistakes entirely. It’s about the recovery. It’s the ability to shake it off, recalibrate, and step into the next moment unshaken. And that’s the real measure of mastery. Not perfection, but the strength to pull yourself up, dust off the doubt, and find clarity again.
Today, we’re diving into resilience; not as a lofty ideal, but as a skill. A flexible toolbox you can rely on when the heat turns up. Because let’s face it, officiating isn’t a game of flawless execution. It’s a game of how well you respond when the inevitable happens.
Let’s go.
The Reset Toolbox: Pathways Back to Clarity
Resilience starts in the moment those doubts creep in, the moment after the error, when your mind wants to dwell, replay, and analyze. That’s where the battle begins. The key? Learning how to reset, refocus, and move forward with intention.
Here’s where we can lean on practical tools. Think of them as pathways back to clarity, not a rigid formula to follow step by step, but a flexible set of tools to pull out when the moment calls for it.
Tool 1: Release The Balloon - Letting Go
Mistakes can stick in your mind like extra baggage, slowing you down and clouding your judgment. But letting them go isn’t about pretending the mistake didn’t happen; it’s about choosing not to let the extra baggage define what comes next.
A simple mental exercise can help. Picture the mistake as a balloon. Visualize it clearly: the frustration, the doubt, written on the balloon’s surface. Now, take a deep breath and count down from 5..4..3..2..1. Then, consciously release it and watch as it drifts away until it’s out of sight.
This exercise creates the mental space you need to focus on the next play. It’s not about erasing the mistake, but about making room for what comes next.
Tool 2: The Anchor & Reset - Grounding Yourself
Mistakes often pull you into the past, replaying the moment over and over again. But the game doesn’t stop, it keeps moving forward, and so must you. That’s where grounding yourself comes in, keeping your body and mind rooted in the present. Staying present physically and mentally is one of the most underrated skills in officiating.
If you read Part 2, you are already aware of the power of anchoring to sharpen focus. The good part is, anchoring isn’t a one-time exercise; it’s a skill you can rely on, no matter where or when you need it. It’s just as powerful in the heat of the moment, when emotions run high and clarity feels out of reach.
By anchoring yourself in the present, you cut through the noise of overthinking and bring your attention back to the action on the court. A quick breathing exercise can help: inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, and exhale slowly for 6 seconds. Pair this with a physical anchor, something subtle but deliberate, like gripping your whistle, tapping your leg, or making a small fist gesture.
The anchor acts as your reset button, signaling to your mind: “I’m here. Be here.”
With each breath, remind yourself of a grounding phrase: “Next call, next play” or “Stay where your feet are.” This small shift can stop the spiral of overthinking and bring your focus back to where it belongs: the present moment.
Tool 3: Body Tension Check - Releasing the Shoulders
Stress doesn’t just affect your mind—it builds up in your body, too. A mistake can leave you with tight shoulders, a clenched jaw, or stiff posture. If left unchecked, this tension makes it harder to regain control.
Scan your body to find that tension and reset. Take a slow breath and mentally scan your body from head to toe. Be aware of your body. Is your jaw clenched? Relax it. Are your shoulders tight? Let them drop. Hands gripping too tightly? Loosen them.
With each deep breath, imagine the tension flowing out of your body. A relaxed body means a clearer, sharper mind, ready for the next call.
Tool 4: The Perspective Shift - Reframing the Mistake
In the heat of the moment, a mistake can feel monumental. But here’s a hint: what feels massive to you, like a missed call that will overshadow the entire game, is likely just a blip to everyone else.
When self-doubt creeps in, reframe the mistake. Instead of spiraling into “I messed up,” remind yourself:
“Mistakes are part of the game.”
“It’s not the error that defines me, forget it, leave it behind.”
Shift your focus to what’s ahead: “The next call is the most important call.” Resilient referees know this: your influence lies in what comes next, not in what just happened.
The Unseen Strength of Resilience
I still remember a game I officiated not too long ago. A rivalry matchup, packed stands, and endless drama. Later in the second quarter, I made what I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, was a wrong call. A clear blocked shot was called as a foul. I felt the shift immediately—a wave of tension from the bench, murmurs from the crowd.
That’s the kind of moment that makes or breaks you. As I stepped back into position, my mind wanted to linger, to overanalyze, and even to blame myself. But what’s done is done; you can’t undo and cannot go back in time. Instead, I gripped my whistle, took a deep breath, and tried to focus my attention on the next play. That adjustment didn’t erase the mistake. But it ensured that it didn’t define my night either.
Looking back on the game film later, I saw other mistakes, sure. But I also noticed something else; a consistency, a calm that carried me through. And for the players, the coaches, the fans? The focus wasn’t on the officiating. It was on the game. And that’s always the goal for a good officiating.
Closing Thoughts: It’s About Progress, Not Perfection
Resilience isn’t a one-and-done skill—it’s a practice. Every game, every whistle is an opportunity to build and strengthen it. And over time, it becomes second nature. You don’t just recover from mistakes; you grow stronger because of them.
The next time you feel the weight of a tough call or a critical moment, remember this: resilience isn’t just your shield, it’s your stepping stone. And with it, there’s no challenge you can’t rise above.
Officiating is more than making the right calls; it’s about embracing the journey of progress.
A Continuous Cycle of Growth
Resilience isn’t the end of the story, it’s part of a cycle. It loops back to preparation, sharpening your focus for the next game. Together, resilience, preparation, and emotional control form a cycle of continuous improvement, building the foundation for confidence, clarity, and control.
As we conclude our Psychology of Officiating series, here’s how it all connects:
Emotional Control → Resilience: Staying composed under pressure helps you bounce back from mistakes.
Resilience → Pre-Game Preparation: Reflection fuels better preparation for the next challenge.
Pre-Game Preparation → Emotional Control: Being mentally prepared strengthens your ability to stay calm and focused.
Officiating is more than making the right calls; it’s about embracing the journey of progress. With emotional control, preparation and resilience, every game becomes an opportunity to refine your craft and strengthen your mindset.
After all, the greatest call you’ll ever make is choosing to grow, one game at a time.
These are awesome strategies! Love it :)